As my father used to tell me, the only true sign of success in life is being able to do for a living that which makes you happy.

— Al Yankovic

I'll bet every great thinker and leader we've got Could see all kinds of things other people could not! So then why get upset if somebody like metrics to look at the world just a bit differently?

— Al Yankovic

I'm an ugly girl, My face makes you hurl, Sad I have it, I should bag it. Acne everywhere, Unwanted facial hair. I'm a relation to Frankenstein's creation.

— Al Yankovic

It's hard to force creativity and humor.

— Al Yankovic

One of my pet peeves is that sometimes the talents of my band get overlooked because, and it was the same problem that Frank Zappa had, with a lot of groups that use humor, people don't realize there's a lot of craft behind the comedy.

— Al Yankovic

Why of course it's unlikely!' I said. 'Oh, by far! The awesome-est things in the world often are!

— Al Yankovic