Accentuate the positives - medicate the negatives.

— Amy Sedaris

Books are challenging and inspirational to me.

— Amy Sedaris

Don't answer the door in a wedding dress and veil, he might not think you're joking.

— Amy Sedaris

Don't leave a piece of jewelry at his house so you can go back and get it later he may be with his real girlfriend.

— Amy Sedaris

I don't mind pointing out some of the failings of old age, because we are all headed in that direction, unless of course we take our own lives before we become a burden. I'm not advocating suicide, oh wait, I guess I am.

— Amy Sedaris

I failed first grade, which is my biggest problem. You always feel like a failure, like you're stupid.

— Amy Sedaris

I have always wanted a bunny, and I'll always have a rabbit the rest of my life.

— Amy Sedaris

I like crafts that come out of poverty or necessity. There used to be hobby shops where you'd get your supplies, and then you'd use your imagination.

— Amy Sedaris

I like to decide the night before Thanksgiving that I'm going to do it, and I'll see what riffraff is around. Then I get that last-minute surge of energy. But if I had two weeks to plan, sometimes I wish I wasn't doing it. But very seldom does that happen.

— Amy Sedaris

I never really take shortcuts. I was always one of those people who, instead of cutting across someone's yard on the way home from school, I would go to the end of the block and turn.

— Amy Sedaris