Either you're going to shoot us or you're not. The ball always lands on red or black, never both.

— V. Alexander

The trick to being smart is knowing when to play dumb.

— V. Alexander

Tonight I’ve been dealing with a known killer, a male whore, a scam artist, and now I’ve graduated to talking to a mayor. Who’s next? The President of the National Association of Rodents?

— V. Alexander