Americans worship creativity the way they worship physical beauty - as a way of enjoying elitism without guilt: God did it.

— Florence King

A woman must wait for her ovaries to die before she can get her rightful personality back. Post-menstrual is the same as pre-menstrual; I am once again what I was before the age of twelve: a female human being who knows that a month has thirty day, not twenty-five, and who can spend every one of them free of the shackles of that defect of body and mind known as femininity.

— Florence King

Children have no business expressing opinions on anything except "Do you have enough room in the toes?

— Florence King

Gradually my whole concept of time changed until I thought of a month as having twenty-five days of humanness and five others when I might just as well have been an animal in a steel trap.

— Florence King

I'd rather rot on my own floor than be found by a bunch of bingo players in a nursing home.

— Florence King

If any of us had heard the word "feminist" we would have thought it meant a girl who wore too much makeup, but we were, without knowing it, feminists ourselves, bound together by the freemasonry that exists among intelligent women who know they are intelligent. It is the only kind of female bonding that works, which is why most men do not like intelligent women. They don't mind one female brain if they can enjoy it privately; it's the idea of two or more on the loose that upsets them. The girls in the college-bound group might not have been friends in every case--Sharon Cohen and I gave each other willies--but our instincts told us that we had the same enemies.

— Florence King

In Mississippi the important thing is hooch, not bar equipment.

— Florence King

In the South, Sunday morning sex is accompanied by church bells.

— Florence King

[John Edwards] is the man that Arielle Hunter called 'real and authentic,' which tells us all we need to know about her mental abilities. This is why she can't figure out why he picked her. He could have had a multitude of sweet young things, but he chose a 42-year-old who is one bleach job away from turning into one big split end, because his tumescent ego demands that he be the pretty one.

— Florence King

No matter which sex I went to bed with, I never smoked on the street

— Florence King