Have you ever heard a woman claim that the reason why she is chronically mistreating her male partner is because a previous man abused her? I have never run into this excuse in the fifteen years I have worked in the field of abuse. Certainly I have encountered cases where women had trouble trusting another man after leaving an abuser, but there is a critical distinction to be made: Her experiences may explain how she feels, but they are not an excuse for how she behaves. And the same is true for a man.

Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men