It's scary, and downing, that I make my best music when I'm going through my depression... At that moment, all I can see is black, darkness and shadows, but in the bigger picture. It's a blessing. When I look through all my work, my art, I wouldn't change or take away my depression and anxiety for ANYTHING. Because when I get those days of rainbows, and colors. I know deep down, I'm only honest when I'm at the deepest of the oceans. So it's like listening to a different side of my mind, that I never realize exists, until I get that little peek through the blinds, and finally see the sunlight. THEN on those simple moments, even if they only last a few minutes, I know deep down... maybe I do have a talent. Maybe I have got something, a "gift", that some people call... So really, if it wasn't for my depression, I would never, truly believe I have anything worth giving. So I will NOT sit back and wish I wasn't clinically depressed, I will learn to embrace it, live with it, and talk my brain into believing, and fully knowing, I HAVE A GIFT. I AM WORTHY. I DO HAVE SOMETHING TO GIVE THE WORLD. Furthermore, I will not let my depression or anxiety control me. They can live here(in my mind), but they best know, I AM STILL, AND WILL ALWAYS BE IN CONTROL. . BUT This is my home, and you're just living under it.
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