Simply put, she was the one who had to put up with me. That she did so with love and patience and encouragement instead of strangling me, throwing my remains into a wood chipper, and then pretending she had never been married to me at all is a testament to the fact that she is, in fact, the single best person I know.

— John Scalzi

That’s what I’d ask you to do: Hope for peace. Because I know that I would love to be able to lay down my weapon and get to being a colonist. Just like you are. Just like I want to be.

— John Scalzi

The failure mode of clever is “asshole.

— John Scalzi

Then you're seventy-five, friends are dead, and you've replaced at least one major organ: you have to pee four times a night, and you can't go up a flight a stair without being little winded -- and you're told you're in pretty good shape for your age. [....], in a decade you'll be eighty-five, and the only difference between you and a raisin will be that while you're both wrinkled and without a prostate, the raisin never had a prostate to begin with.

— John Scalzi

The problem with aging is not that it's one damn thing after another—it's every damn thing, all at once, all the time.

— John Scalzi

The rest of the rebels were recruited from the ranks of the young and excitable and had rather more enthusiasm than skill.

— John Scalzi

The story of how I left Huckleberry begins -- as do all worthy stories -- with a goat

— John Scalzi

The universe is a big place. Maybe we're not in the best neighborhood.

— John Scalzi

The universe isn't going to be conquered by legions of geriatrics. No offense.

— John Scalzi

To everyone who thinks writing a sequel should be easy because you've already created the universe: BWA ha ha ha ha ha ha! He. No.

— John Scalzi