When you write it, don't write it in the manner of a spooky story. Don't try to give an explanation. Just say that I don't know what to make of it, just write it like I tell it, so the reader can make up his own mind.

— David Mitchell

Why have you given your life to books, TC? Dull, dull, dull! The memoirs are bad enough, but all that ruddy fiction! Hero goes on a journey, stranger comes to town, somebody wants something, they get it, or they don't, will is pitted against will. "Admire me, for I am a metaphor.

— David Mitchell

Will I be some kid’s dad one day? Are any future people lurking deep inside mine?... Which girl’s carrying the other half of my kid, deep in those intricate loops? What’s she doing right now? What’s her name?

— David Mitchell

Women, oh, women! They'll find the baddest meanin' in your words an' hold it up, sayin', Look what you attacked me with!

— David Mitchell

Words are what you fight with but what you fight about is whether you’re afraid of them.

— David Mitchell

You groan and shake your head, Six smith, I know, but you smile too, which is why I love you.

— David Mitchell

Young mothers are the most vicious tribe in the world if you don't fit in.

— David Mitchell

You only value something if you know it’ll end.

— David Mitchell

Your leaders must know powerful magic. Yes, said one of the women. The magic is called Marx, Stalin, Lenin and Class Dialectics. It didn't sound like very powerful magic to me.

— David Mitchell

You say you're 'depressed' - all I see is resilience. You are allowed to feel messed up and inside out. It doesn't mean you're defective - it just means you're human.

— David Mitchell