I think flying planes into a building was a faith-based initiative. I think religion is a neurological disorder.

— Bill Maher

I think religion is a neurological disorder.

— Bill Maher

It is not a surprise that a person would want to be a prophet. What's ridiculous is that other people let him.

— Bill Maher

It's a funny thing about Americans, we love to bitch about paying too much for the things we really need and are really a bargain, like gas and postage stamps, but we willingly shell out outrageous amounts for unnecessary crap like gourmet coffee and soap to make your crotch smell good. Two dollars a gallon to go ten miles is too much, but five to the parking valet to go ten feet is okay.

— Bill Maher

It's not that we don't care--it's just that we'd prefer not to get involved.

— Bill Maher

Jesus is great -- is there a better role model? No. It's religion, it's the people who get in between -- the bureaucracy, you know. ... It's the way people abuse Jesus. Was there ever a greater victim of name-dropping?

— Bill Maher

Just like in the workplace, women who are good workers are the best workers.

— Bill Maher

Last week, I suggested the candidates take up mushrooms. I’ll be damned if Rick Perry didn’t take me up on that.

— Bill Maher

Let's make a law that gay people can have birthdays, but straight people get more cake--you know, to send the right message to kids.

— Bill Maher

Men are only as loyal as their options.

— Bill Maher